The Marriage Gamble

10 Who can find a virtuous woman?

for her price is far above rubies.

11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her,

so that he shall have no need of spoil.

12 She will do him good and not evil

all the days of her life.

13 She seeketh wool, and flax,

and worketh willingly with her hands.

14 She is like the merchants 'ships;

she bringeth her food from afar.

15 She riseth also while it is yet night,

and giveth meat to her household,

and a portion to her maidens.

16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it:

with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

17 She girdeth her loins with strength,

and strengtheneth her arms.

18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good:

her candle goeth not out by night.

19 She layeth her hands to the spindle,

and her hands hold the distaff.

20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor;

yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household:

for all her household are clothed with scarlet.

22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry;

her clothing is silk and purple.

23 Her husband is known in the gates,

when he sitteth among the elders of the land.

24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it;

and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

25 Strength and honour are her clothing;

and she shall rejoice in time to come.

26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom;

and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

27 She looketh well to the ways of her household,

and eateth not the bread of idleness.

28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed;

her husband also, and he praiseth her.

29 Many daughters have done virtuously,

but thou excellest them all.

30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain:

but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

31 Give her of the fruit of her hands;

and let her own works praise her in the gates. (Proverbs 31:10-31)

I read something in an article yesterday about a new law here that gives a woman the right to call the police to evict her husband from their home and prevent him from seeing their children. In both cases evidence was not required, only an accusation of abuse.
It gave me a twinge of fear like I have never had before about getting married in the future. If I get married to a selfish woman she will have almost complete power to use to manipulate me. There is nothing really different from this law and so many previous laws, but it highlights the complete helplessness of the husband in my society. I have always known it is important to choose a wife carefully, but it seems that the stakes just got a lot higher.
Reading this section from Proverbs 31 just now I see that nothing has changed that much. A husband has always needed to be able to trust his wife. A wife has always been able to destroy her husband. Therefore a trustworthy and selfless wife is the most valuable thing in the world.
You should see beauty in a woman if you are to marry her, but that is not the priority. If you want to find a woman that will not destroy your life she should fear Jehovah, then he will be faithful and learn the many things she will need to be a good mother.

Note to the ladies: if you are wanting to get married don't try to choose between faith or beauty, you must have both. Beauty does not come from makeup, jewellery or expensive clothes, that is what will make other women compliment you, it won't make you beautiful. Health of body, gentleness of character and soundness of mind are beautiful. Be feminine too, you may not mind using the clothes (e.g. trousers), behaviour (e.g. drinking) and conversation (e.g. swearing) of men but it's not at all beautiful for a woman.